Joe Hakim Page 2 Which side are you on? Joe's contributions are listed below.. Page 1, Page 2.

Poetry - Response To Those Who Doubt (You know who you are) By Joe Hakim

Dead from the neck up motherfuckers, taking me to task for the thing they lack: a passion that burns and erupts    Read more...

Fiction - Gloomy Sunday By Joe Hakim
	As we got closer I could see it framed against the horizon. From this distance it just looked like a huge black shape, like a giant lump of coal or something. "Jeezus, it's huge," I said. "Yeah, I'm guessing it's a male," Mike said. "Could be about fifty tonnes of whale washed up down there." Mike was a marine biologist. He'd been given the task of studying Read more...

Poetry - We Are All Cartoons Now By Joe Hakim

Setting up a trap the immaculate disappointment capped off with regret, things we could have changed or done    Read more...

Fiction - The Guy Who Had All The Time In The World By Joe Hakim
	Sometimes it gets to be a bit too fuckin' much, I decide, after another day spent wandering the streets aimlessly. The sky is still bright purple - the colour of a fresh bruise - and the streets are still completely silent; not even the sound of birds chirping or distant traffic in the distance. Aside from that, everything seems to be much the same, at least on the surface. There's no visible Read more...

Fiction - The Burden - A Short Story By Joe Hakim
	I step out into the sun and close my eyes, letting the light wash over my face. It's cold, and the wind pinches my cheeks but I feel complete, for the first time ever. Today the world is different. Today is the first day of a new beginning. Everything feels real and vivid, and I bathe in it, taking it all in like a child seeing a painting for the first time, judging the angles and Read more...

Poetry - Picking Up Sluts In Retro By Joe Hakim

Me and me mates were in Retro last night and we met these tarts and we fucked 'em    Read more...

Opinions - The King Is Dead...Again By Joe Hakim
	Well, I've just read Steve Regan's latest column, and I'm glad to see that the old cigar-chomping fuckwit hasn't let me down. I can still remember seeing his mug leering out from the top of his shitty sub-Gary Bushell column in the Hull Daily Mail, and by the look of it he hasn't managed to land his dream job as a Sun hack, but then again, even people who write for the tabloids need Read more...

Poetry - Two Coppers In A Subaru By Joe Hakim

Two coppers in a Subaru looking like Shaggy and Scooby-do in the Mystery-Machine. Winding down the window, one of them asks: 'Where you goin' son,    Read more...

Poetry - Talking In Circles By Joe Hakim

The broken spill that came out of you could be viewed as a substitute for the things that we never ended up    Read more...

Poetry - Ego Inoculation No 1 By Joe Hakim

Strip the year away and throw it on the shit heap of memory, take a step back from the cult of your own personality. Look at you now - see how your ego has grown,    Read more...

Music Reviews - 13th October 05 - thisisUll.com Keeping It Peel at The Silhouette By Joe Hakim Photographs by Darren Rogers and Mo
	Whenever a musical icon dies, there always follows a period where their name and image is turned into a commodity. The best current example would be John Lennon. The celebration of what would have been his sixty-fifth birthday and the impending twentieth anniversary of his death has sent the record companies and the various conglomerates that Read more...

Poetry - (I Got Those) Special Brew Blues By Joe Hakim

S'only about sixty pee a tin, so it's a bargin by any motherfucker's reckoning. A day on the street or sitting on my seat asking, chasing, scoring, snoring    Read more...

Poetry - What Happens Next? By Joe Hakim

Freedom equality shit like that I agree it's noble in theory in principle and I try to live my life    Read more...

Fiction - Zero and the Neighbours Part 1 - Demo version 0.1 By Joe Hakim
	Frank was one of the regulars. From the first day I started dealing poker on the tables, Frank was there. To look at, he was your typical moody old man - old in the Father Christmas sense - white hair, a huge white beard and a round gut that hung out of his shirt and over his belt. You could imagine him sat in a grotto in the bottom of Princes Quay with some mewling Read more...

Poetry - Everybody Do The Bandwagon By Joe Hakim

Come swooping in like vultures around the carcass of a beast lying dead in the desert - lizards crawling between the teeth of its rictus grin - smile for the camera baby. Trying to get involved in 'scenes'    Read more...

Poetry - Stuck in a Continuous Loop by Joe Hakim

Stood in the phone box in Hull's town centre, drunk as fuck tray of kebab meat in my hand, dead lambs' eyelids and sphincters with chips,    Read more...

Music Reviews - Sunday 31st July 06 - Benefit Gig at Staks Bar By Joe Hakim Photos By Roland Standaert
	It's an early start, three in the afternoon, but it's for a good cause. Sundays, and the weekend in general, tend to be meaningless when you're unemployed, yet you always feel obligated to spend as much time in bed and do as little as possible in between bouts of napping. A lot of this is due to the fact that there's fuck all on TV on a Sunday. There's hardly anything good on TV during Read more...

Poetry - Ripped To Shreds By Joe Hakim

It's on the back of a bad night -one of the fuckin' worst -the dealers are new, unprepared, and the players are mean tonight, the hunger making them    Read more...

Poetry - Discovering a Horrible Truth while Dumping the Rubbish By Joe Hakim

Moved into this new place- another momentary sanctuary, it's in the town centre -no wheelie bin, so I didn't know what    Read more...

Music Reviews - Monday 25th July - Hayseed Dixie at The Cockpit, Leeds By Joe Malarky Whole lotta Dixie
	I discovered Hayseed Dixie whilst searching for a version of Duelling Banjos in my local record shop. I won't go into why I was searching for the main tune from Deliverance, that's my business and anyway it's not important. What does matter is that I was intrigued by the Tennessee quartet. I did a little research and found that their beliefs are simple. All good songs Read more...

Fiction - Drowning, Swimming By Joe Hakim
	Keith sat and stared at his wife, who was holding his daughter and staring at the 28" Philips Widescreen TV situated in the corner of his house, on his laminate floor, flanked at either side by his Sony sound system and his X-Box. He was sweating and his head was throbbing - the general effects of the weekend Read more...

Music Reviews - Saturday 16th July 05 - Doing Hull a Favour - Silhouette Club By Joe Hakim
	So I'm walking down Beverley Road, and as I'm walking this car stops at the lights and a guy hangs it head out of the window and shouts across to me, "Ey, mate...yeah you!" I try to ignore him, but seeing as I'm the only person on the street, there's no doubt in my mind that he's talking to me. Shit... "I think yer've dropped summat, mate," he yells. Read more...

Music Reviews - Tuesday 12th July 05 - The Paddingtons Single Release at Ringside and Signing at HMV By Joe Hakim Photos by Darren Rogers
	I'm not quite ready for the sun when I step into it, and if I'm being honest about it I still haven't recovered from the weekend. I spent it in Bridlington, trying to devise ways to sneak into the Kings of Leon gig. At the last minute I rolled up to the door with a friend who employed some kind of Jedi mind-trick. It was a brain bending trick, and needless to say, I got fuckin' smashed in celebration. Read more...

Music Reviews - Wednesday 6th July 05 - Farewell to the Raywells? By Joe Hakim Photo Gallery By Michelle Dee

Ah, wet Wednesday, if it's not a cliché already, then it should be. It's The Raywells' reunion gig at The Piper, so I decide to go. The fact that I'm getting in for nowt, has absolutely nothing to do with it, honest. I'm one skint motherfucker, so I have to walk to Newland Avenue from the town centre. It's a bit of a fuckin' hike, especially when it's pissing it down. The shit British summer Read more...

Articles - Panic, Paranoia and Peter Levy's Top Lip By Joe Hakim

	The world is a welter of conflicting fanaticisms - Betrand Russell And so it begins... You can feel it, a charge building - energy rushing up through our veins, a huge shock to the brain, fuse has gone, no light anymore. The smell of candle wax in your nostrils. Squinting in the dark. The fuse has gone. Read more...

Articles - Quitting My Job - A Prologue By Joe Hakim

The idea comes to me in a dream. I know listening to other people's dreams is more boring than listening to their problems, but bear with me. I grab an hour's kip before work, and I enter that half-asleep/half-awake state where dreams are vivid and loaded with symbols. I'm in my flat and I have a pet lion. I'm watching it run around, and I'm upset because I know that I have to get rid of it Read more...

Poetry - Stabbing a Word to Death in Broad Daylight By Joe Hakim

Don't say it don't even mention it. Don't say it because you don't mean it. Don't say it   Read more...

Poetry - A Sincere, Heartfelt Apology to my Stomach, Intestines and Guts in General by Joe Hakim

I'm sorry, I don't know if it's more for myself, or for you, but seeing as you   Read more...

Poetry - Gravity Always Wins By Joe Hakim

There's this girl I know she's not a lover not even a friend if I'm honest about it, just a girl   Read more...

Poetry - Watch Yourself By Joe Hakim

Taking my watch off letting the burden on my arm, on my life, drop to the floor at the end of the night,   Read more...

Poetry - Life in a B-Movie Subplot of Your Own Making By Joe Hakim

We're not together, we're in the same room, she's just there, a bit lonely, a bit desperate, waiting to see if anything happens,    Read more...

Poetry - Best Before Date By Joe Hakim

She comes cutting through me and for a moment, I don't think about who or what,    Read more...

Poetry - Maybe Next Week By Joe Hakim

You're sat at a bar and the decision you need to make, but can't, sits across from you and tries to stare you out. Read more...

Poetry - A Bad Case of Paranoia One Morning By Joe Hakim

Slowly it begins to dawn on you- the people you thought were friends aren't;   Read more...

Articles - About Crazy Shit By Joe Hakim

	So we stumble out of the horror of Christmas into the New Year, bleary-eyed and confused, with the nagging feeling we've missed something. I was working all through Christmas and New Year. Even though I spent New Year's Eve working, stood in Read more...

Poetry - Feeling like the Hulk on a Wednesday By Joe Hakim

	You've heard it before but I'm saying it again: you become that which you despise. Excuse me while I change, Read more...

Poetry - In the End By Joe Hakim

	In the end you have to settle for the moments in between everything else. You get in from work Read more...

Articles - Selling an Engine By Joe Hakim

	So I'm at my mate's house. It's my night off, and he's just finished work, so I go there for something to do. Do something other than my girlfriend for a change. My mate and I sit and smoke a couple of joints and listen to really old-school rap like NWA and Public Enemy. We talk about the Read more...

Articles - Stop Me and Buy One By Joe Hakim

	So I'm heading home after a night out. It's cold and raining, but I decide to walk anyway. I need the time alone. I'm walking past Yello and I notice a fight happening on the opposite corner of the street outside what used to be Buzz Bar. Two young lads, completely pissed out of their Read more...

Articles - Eat Your End of an Era By Joe Hakim

	So I agree to go and watch my mate play a set at the Welly club. I've stopped clubbing, but I go anyway, because he's my mate and I said I would. When I say clubbing, I mean the whole go out take drugs and dance thing. Read more...

Articles - My New Boss By Joe Hakim

	My new boss is a Nazi pig-fucker from Hell. There, I've said it. Just writing it and then re-reading it is enough to make me feel immeasurably better about my work related predicament. My current job involves working with the general public, a vague term at best. Read more...

Articles - Big Screens, Beslan and the Bus Home By Joe Hakim

	I decide to go into town to buy a CD and a magazine. As I'm leaving Whitefriargate I bump into a mate that I haven't seen in ages. We talk for a bit, all the 'Hey, how the fuck are you, yer bastard,' shit, and then we decide to go and have a couple of cheeky pints. Read more...

Articles - Going Through Doors By Joe Hakim

	My mate from work rings me up and asks me if I want to go out, so I say, Fuck it, why not? I hate going round town, but I've had more nights out over the last few weeks than I've had in ages. I can feel myself de-evolving into something less, yet something more. Somebody stop me. Read more...