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Last Updated: 27/10/2009 10:45:04
Sweet As A Nut
By Mike Watts

I'm under the shower
Just about finished

I turn the dial
Squeak back my wet hair

I'm done

I pull back the curtain
And with one foot up
On the side of the bath
I reach down and take hold
Of my leathery sack

I squeeze and poke
Around both stones gently
Carefully
Like a swan settling on eggs

And on each occasion
That I do this
I hold my breath

Desperate never to discover
That unwanted third one
That rotten one
The life changer
The 50,000 volt heart slammer
A discovery worse than finding
Your best buddy giving it
Sweaty loads at the back
Of your woman or
Watching firemen hosing
Down your house
Or ...

I give it
A good half a minute
And then release myself
Begin towelling
Feeling slightly above average

You see
I'm out tonight and
I'm going to get ratted and
Maybe get lucky and
I'm truly thankful

That my world
As far as I'm aware

Isn't ready to explode

Just yet!

Copyright Mike Watts 2009
thisisUll.com Featured Writer Mike Watts
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