Larkin 25 - Me Selfish? No! By Brian Cotton

Married? You want to get married? Are you having a laugh? Sorry for sounding snappy, But why spoil what we have? No, that's never going to happen, I ain't moving in, It's against my religion, I aint living in sin. Of course sex is different, That's just a bit of fun, What you pulling a face for? Come on cheer up, hun. Hey come on let me treat you, Take you out for a meal, But I am a little short on cash, So it'll have to be a 2 for 1 deal. I don't know why you're pulling a face babe, You know that I'm poor, Talking of which I'm not paid till Friday, Will you lend me a score? There you go with that face again, You know I'll never reach perfection, I think you need some cheering up, Let's go in the bedroom and I'll give you a nice injection! I can see you're getting annoyed, Why don't I pull down my zip, You can let off a bit steam, Give me a little lip. Is there something up girl? You had a bad day at work? That boss of yours been giving you stick, I'll chin the little berk. Look, I think you need cheering up, Maybe we should have a threesome, Before you dismiss it out of hand, Think about it, .it might be fun. How about with Ellie, Your sexy flat mate? I'm sure she was giving me the come on, Last night when you were late. We could set it up for next week. You could cook some food, I could bring a couple of bottles of wine, To get us in the mood. Oh, what the hell was that for? Why did you slap my face? What do you mean I'm selfish, That I'm a bleedin' disgrace? You know what? I'm fed up of your moaning, I don't need this shit in my life, I'm getting my stuff together, I'm going home to my wife.

Copyright © Brian Cotton 2010

Poetry - Larkin 25 - The Demon Driver of Holderness By David Thompson

With monobosom, crocheted hat, When once behind the wheel she's sat, This luminary of the ladies circle, Around the country roads will hurtle, At breakneck speed from place to place, To With and back at blistering pace, O'er the hill and down the dell, White knuckle ride, bat out of hell, Read more...

Poetry Larkin 25 - Without You By John Fewings

Without you - Sweet and sour would just taste bitter, Every street be filled with litter. I'd exercise but not get fitter, Need laughing gas to raise a titter - Without you. Granny Smiths would be less juicy, There'd be no gander for the goosey, Read more...

Poetry - Larkin 25 - Distraction By Robert Swan
	I was looking at your legs, Those curves that sway down To your toes. I was enjoying your lips, Then your eyes; Then your nose. I was lost on a pathway I would love to retrace, Across the pristine paradise Read more...

Poetry - Larkin25 - Pointless Journey By Mark Walmsley
	As I sit here, In this half way, Cafe Staring blankly through The rain soaked window Pushing unwanted food Around my plate, all chipped and dirty My half eaten breakfast, Read more...

Poetry - Larkin 25 - The University of Hull Students Union By Julie Corbett

With the right shoes and standing away from the Dance floor; you can feel a sticky ooze in the carpet of John McCarthy's Bar. Not strong enough to hold you fast, it tells of Happy Hours and those Real Ale fests where Read more...

Poetry - Larkin25 - To Skipper Pete By Terry Ireland

Today I walked the Humber Bank Across the old locks On in the grey drizzle Through the old town docks; Normally a solitary walk but Today I happened to meet An ex trawler skipper from Our old deep sea fishing fleet. He told me the fleet still existed Read more...

Poetry - Larkin 25 - This Be The Verse By Bronwyn Ellis
	They fuck you up The politicians They may not mean to But they do They fill you up with endless lies False promises made just for you But they were fucked up in their turn When Eaton moulded the young MPs A stiff upper lip as a stiff lower member Read more...

Poetry Larkin 25 - Rock and Soul By Kerry-Joe Pulford

And he stared at me forever, Like he wanted to lick me, Like I was rock with 'Soul' writ through me, And if he just had money, house, car and a ring He could be one of us, and talk about things I could sense his anguish, well this bit - The 'Take him to the pub and make him fit' shit. But I couldn't turn away, Read more...

Poetry - War Broke Out When I Was Young By George William Beswick

The War broke out when I was young, And I'd never been away, And then the 'call up' papers came, To join in the affray. And on a January morn, 'Mid lots of frost and snow, I left my dear beloved home, To be a soldier I must go Read more...

Poetry - Remembrance Day By Terry Ireland

I sat there in silence as the 11th hour chimed just a little tribute BBC timed then for those few who bothered the world set off again not a fitting tribute for those lost women and men Read more...

Poetry - Blitzed Not Broken By David Bannister

What is this talk about a war? They can't be right, they can't be sure. But they were right I soon learnt, The bombed our city, how it all burnt. The city was ours, the name was Hull, A man called Hitler had started his cull. It never took him very long, September the fourth he came along. Read more...

Poetry - For Those Who Died By Ted Harben

If pale at the concrete centre of town There stood on Remembrance Day, A soldier in blood-stained battle-dress With a tin, and a poppy tray, Could you hurry by with head held high With never a glance his way At his wounded side, his hands, his feet Read more...

Poetry - Over The Top By Mark Walmsley
	We huddle, in this puddle, waiting for the shells to stop. We cry, we turn, our heads to the sky, a whistle to go over the top Can't get a grip, we fall we slip, knee high we wade through the mud A foot on the ladder, piss from a weak bladder, dead men fall back with a thud. The mustard air, Read more...

Poetry - A Soldier's Appeal, From One Killed In Ireland By Ted Harben

Will no-one buy a poppy just for the likes of me? Born, I was in sixty-one and died in eighty-three. I joined up as a soldier in nineteen seventy-eight and little thought my uniform Read more...

Poetry - Larkin 25 - Single Mums By Gary Clark

It's a lonely life for a single mum An empty purse When the shopping's done Beans on toast Every night for tea The staple diet of a one parent family. Her baby sleeps soundly on Read more...

Poetry - Umberto Echoes By Lee Cassanell

	A pillared salt of sinners, dissolving in the rain The wear of time it suffers, and we are not to blame. A fragile dream is scripture A Prophet's passion bled The humor of perception Read more...

Poetry - Larkin 25 - Popstar By Ray Moody

He reflected, 'Hadn't he always been so near yet so far?' Wasn't he there right at the start with The Beatles? They might have had their Mersey Beat but hadn't he been part of the Humber Beat, and wasn't water, water? The trouble was that nobody else wanted it, Did any agents, record companies or managers, bother coming to this city? Read more...

Poetry Ten Foot Cock By Lady Larkin

I've been reading this for years now, And at first I thought it was alright, But the same old grudges and points you make, Are turning the mag into shite. For christsakes, We get it, You're an 'in-de-pen-dent -mag-a-zine', Read more...

Poetry Plodding Into History By Vaughan Clements

	A colliery in Yorkshire, April 1969, A powerful image captured In the darkness of a mine. As a picture tells a story, This one relates to Ball, A pony blessed with massive strength, Though only 12 hands tall. Read more...

Poetry No Toads Today By Darren Sant

	I walked along the road, Perchance to see a toad, I wanted to see a toad with spots, But there it was not, A dastardly fiendish plot? A felt like such a clot! The toads they'd gone a Larkin. Read more...

Poetry When We Had It All By Dobski

Midnight 'ire car, drivin' down dark country lanes, anticipation builds MDMA flows through the veins. Four o' five young bucks raring to go, we each popped a pill over an 'our ago. We must be close now, somewhere round 'ere, could be the party of the year. 'Ere we go lads'... I jus' seen, Read more...