Ah! But Does Crime Pay? By Mike Watts

Of course crime pays silly twat Ask the druggie in his luxury flat With a ton of bling dripping from his skin A new BM and a baseball bat. Ask the murderer on day release With his finger raised to the police Stalking somebody's wife or daughter Another poor bastard to the slaughter. Look at the pissed-up hit and runner Or the sight-destroying pellet gunner A six months break at Butlinsville While we soft bastards foot the bill. Well I say whip 'em, burn 'em 'Cos you'll never learn 'em Sling 'em all together on a rock And if she ' did it ' bang her up If he rapes let's have his cock. But they won't 'cos they daren't So fuck all's ever learnt Well I'm sorry but there's only so much I can suffer. Mr Judge in your court (until some cunt slits your throat) A BAG OF FUCKING TOFFEES 'UD BE TOUGHER.

Copyright © 2006  Mike Watts

Poetry - In the Kitchen By Maolsheachlann O' Ceallaigh.

	Dawn chews her toast and gazes out At snowflakes falling through the air. The comb runs gently through her hair - Her mother knows how much she hates The roots pulled at. They think about The very same thing, unaware,    Read more...

Poetry - APATHY! By Rich Mills
	APATHY, APATHY, APATHY. APATHY, APATHY, APATHY. APATHY, APATHY, APATHY. APATHY, APATHY, APATHY. APATHY, APATHY, APATHY. APATHY, APATHY, APATHY. Read more...

Poetry - Muses In Moonlight By Kay Gower

	I sat beneath the willow, and stepped through the looking glass Long ages, eons passed, suns were born and flamed into supernova, galaxies wheeled at least one revolution around the cosmos, between one moment and the next, as the lake and I had a chat. Read more...

Poetry - Reality Shows By Patrick Henry
	China is making uniforms for the British Army. In Aldershot golf clPubs old Colonels go barmy. Our image and defences gravely threatened. The Chinks will stitch us up when they lose the thread-end. Our regiments to look like aliens in the desert war, And U.S allies to hit them with friendly fire. When Royal Marines' Read more...

Poetry - Just The Way It Is By Joe Hakim

Scraping by on the minimum wage, my life in a cage, counting down the days until I next get paid, watch the money come in, watch it fly out again    Read more...

Poetry - Last No'ell At Scarborough By Patrick Henry
	Christmas day comes. I've seen a wilder funeral. Pubs open their eyes, their doors in morning mist a while; Pull a free pint if they should remember you. Then lunchtime's a bad moment if you are a turkey, A vegetarian or a republican amid the carnage. It gets no better for anyone by the TV stage. The Monarch says today Read more...

Poetry - The Voyage By Andy Grant

	I'm leaving now across the sea who knows to where, Maybe to an island or distant coastline, Never touched by man before, there to be explored, Leaving behind a life so tired with faces missed, Not knowing if they will be here when I return. Out of the bay where friends grew up strong, Passing barges laden with Read more...

Poetry - Stop Me And Buy One By Lee Cassanell

	His gigantic cone Caught the light of my eyes I was five nearly six When he parked up outside And I knew from that day That it's not a bad life When the sun's on your face    Read more...

Poetry - A Small Price To Pay By Daphne Liver
	My friend said I'm naïve Because I found it hard To believe when she said that she'd Give Gary a blowjob In exchange for 10 grand. Apparently, if he Read more...

Poetry - Geriatric Blues By Maurice Fairfield
	Now all my fellow oldies I hope you're feeling well Listen what I'm sayin' cause I got a tale to tell I got the blues, I got the blues. I got the geriatric blues Joints are creakin' bladder's leakin' teeth are missin' Havin' trouble pissin,' got the blues, the geriatric blues. Go spread the news about the blues, Read more...

Poetry - Response To Those Who Doubt (You know who you are) By Joe Hakim

Dead from the neck up motherfuckers, taking me to task for the thing they lack: a passion that burns and erupts    Read more...

Poetry - Showdown At Flamingo-Land By Patrick Henry
	Flamingo-Land is sheer paradise captured in a name. Exquisite birds turn the trees to fiery flame, Perching there on a rosy-fingered dawn, Or at dusk stretching daylight to sublime perfection. In the wildlife park creatures are good as kept by Noah; Safe from storm, flood and savagery Read more...

Poetry - Thoroughly Lagered-Up Charlie By Jane Foster and Michelle Dee

	I'm thoroughly lagered-up Charlie I'm having such a ball I've got 15 toilets But I piss against the wall I'm thoroughly lagered-up Charlie I eat out of a box Read more...

Poetry - When Frankie Met Prickly By Michelle Dee, Elsie Creek and Jane Foster
	Frankenstein's Fanny met with Prickly Pussy In the middle of a hot, hot day Prickly told a joke which split Frankie's stitches And blew her clean away Frankenstein's Fanny and Prickly Pussy Went out for a ride Read more...

Poetry - The Maritime Museum, Hull By Maolsheachlann O' Ceallaigh.

	The recorded cry of some dead whale resounds Over and over again. Rusted harpoons Hang from the walls. On winter afternoons Descendants of past sailors make the rounds And mouth the names: Diana, Truelove, Swan. Just syllables now. But children must have thrilled To hear them, once.    Read more...

Poetry - THE PRICE WE PAY By Del Abe Jones.

	...We're going to stay the course, of course!... That's what our Pres has always said We're three years into this crazy War With nearly twenty-four hundred Dead. Seventeen thousand wounded folks At least, that's the official count With estimates of forty-some thousand    Read more...

Poetry - We Are All Cartoons Now By Joe Hakim

Setting up a trap the immaculate disappointment capped off with regret, things we could have changed or done    Read more...

Poetry - Saint Patrick's Day By Del Abe Jones.

	The Patron Saint of Ireland Died in the Fifth Century On the seventeenth of March Is that anniversary. That day is during Lent When the Irish celebrate With dance and drink and feast    Read more...

Poetry - I Remember It Well By Jon Stewart

	I met her in Retro No, it was in Mint I said I was loaded You said you were skint! Ah yeah...I remember it well. Said she was from Bransholme Read more...

Poetry - Politics On The Dance-floor By Patrick Henry
	Cuba's dangerous crocodile-shape looms long and slim As a laid girl, a good cigar, or Castro's red regime. A pianist plays Blues out of his back-street door: An instrument from Chicago that'll send no more; Nor glitzy Cadillac cabs that take you for a ride For five bucks anywhere and girls Read more...

Poetry - A Popular Theme By Jane Foster

	For Michael Cassar 1979 - 2000 A popular theme - the good die young, With lips unparted, praise unsung, The ode, the book, the song, the rhyme, The tale of the young man cut down in his prime, The turn of the screw, the whizz of the wheel, The young man dead on a fiver deal. Read more...

Poetry - Picking Up Sluts In Retro By Joe Hakim

Me and me mates were in Retro last night and we met these tarts and we fucked 'em    Read more...