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Fiction
Last Updated: 10/02/2008 12:53:15
Later. Still. (1/3)
By Christopher Skolik
(1/3), (2/3), (3/3).

Maybe human beings get through life by focusing their attention down to the smallest details, those soap opera comings and goings that make up the flickering magic lantern show of day to day existence, the little things that make life worth living, the details that stand between us and the chasm.

Maybe we are not really designed for total awareness of the harsh random cruelties of life, the cold limitless potential, so to protect ourselves we narrow our field of vision, or we turn away.

There are times when the harsh facts of existence make their presence felt. Late at night, alone in bed; a time for painful truths.
Calvin lay on his side, the twisted sheets of a broken and disturbed nights sleep coiling about him; another night spent watching the sweeping light and shadow patterns that passing cars project across the ceiling and walls.

First traces of dawn, purple drizzle turning the streets all leathery, fragmentary bird song embroidering the early traffic sounds of Hull.

Calvin turns over.

His reputation made severe demands upon him, demands that needed to be filled. Reputations need to be fed. Offerings had to be made, trading acts of violence for status.
The vicious and cruel things he had done left their mark, for in order to do such things he dehumanised his victims, and in the process he also dehumanised himself.
He feels the scar on his upper right arm; it aches in the early morning autumn chill. War wounds from the streets, alleyways and pubs of the city.

He feels tired. But it is not an exhaustion of the body, of the flesh, but of somewhere deeper, down into the bones, the very DNA.

Across the inky abstract landscape of his bedroom, the bedside table, he reaches across for the tobacco and cigarette papers-by accident picking up the folded paper with the address, he lets it drop from his fingers.
Daylight is taking hold outside, giving definition to the world, and gradually drives away the shadows, exposing the concerns of the day.

Continued... Next Page (2/3)

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