Dear Diary (4/4) By Ruth

(1/4), (2/4), (3/4). (4/4).

The young girl was eventually transferred to the Intensive Care Unit. As the stricken family huddled around their child, Joe patiently explained the hopelessness of the situation. The family told Joe how the girl had been despondent over the break-up with her boyfriend. The girl's father wept quietly as he shook his head, the wisdom of age highlighting the insanity of the situation. It was her father's handgun. After some discussion, the family gave their consent to allow their child to become an organ donor.

In the early hours of the following morning, Joe finally signed the patient over to the transplant team and was able to sleep for 45 minutes before the next emergency brought us together. My rotation on Surgical ICU ended two weeks later.

Epilogue: Joe went on to complete a cardiovascular fellowship. Tragically, he later was sanctioned and lost his license amidst allegations of sexual harassment and battery. The medical world was denied an excellent surgeon. Generations of nurses were spared the indignity of having him rub their breasts with his elbow while performing surgery (I know what I'm talking about here, if my right breast could talk …).

Tony never allowed reporters in the Emergency Department ever again. To this day Tony refuses to speak to the press, regardless of the topic. The contrary medical student went on to a career of research medicine in a University laboratory, free from the perils of patient care. He is an asset to the world of medical research. I went on to deliver scores (nay, hundreds) of 14-year-old patients in the maternity ward and became increasingly intolerant of the background drama surrounding the young fathers. Sometimes they were present, but more often they were unknown to me. I grew weary of the desperate teen mothers who placed their affection for the absent fathers over the welfare of both their children and themselves. I carefully raised my daughter to love herself, and resist the urge to allow her expectations of men to achieve life-threatening proportions. Our patient would have been 32 years old this year. I have no idea who ultimately received her donated organs. The organ recipients don't usually get much information about their donors. The gift is typically anonymous. I have no knowledge as to the condition of any of the recipients. But I remember the donor vividly, although she never knew me.

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